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It started as a slight premonition, a faint tickling at the back of my mind, like the subtle sense you get when there's a dramatic change in air pressure or humidity.

Ben's death brought it to the front of everybody's mind.

Sailing the high seas involves a lot of traditions, old wive's tales, and superstitions. One of those relates to the fact that every ship has to be christened, that is a bottle of champagne or wine broken across the bow (front) by a woman before it ever goes to sea. Otherwise, the ship is said to be doomed to accidents, or worse, sinking. It's almost as bad luck if the bottle doesn't break on the first swing.

I wasn't onboard when the Ronald Reagan was christened by Nancy Reagan at Newport News Shipyard, but the story has been repeated time and again over the last 5 years, especially as of late. Nancy Reagan may still have her legendary spunk and wit, but she's physically where she was when her husband was president. On the day of christening, she swung the bottle against the bow of the ship- and it bounced back, still intact. She finally got it on the second swing, with the help of her son Michael, but not before the older salts present had started murmuring and whispering their concerns.

Then there were the shipyard workers that were killed during her construction- I know of 4 first-hand, but there are stories saying as many as a dozen people were killed while the ship was being built- another bad luck omen.

I'm afraid to sail on this ship on our upcoming deployment late this year or early next, and I'm not alone in this sentiment. Morale is at an all-time low, and the crew has pretty much completely changed out since we sailed around the horn. In Virginia, we had the best and brightest leadership- the top chiefs and officers all had orders to build the Reagan, but now that we've gotten to San Diego, most have them have returned to the east coast, to be replaced by what seems to be the dregs of the west coast fleet, those personnel that nobody else wanted or would take.

We ran a routine fire drill today with the ship's fire squad, and in less than 5 minutes, over half the fire team I was leading had been wiped out- not due to some freak accident or anything like that, but because people either didn't know what they were supposed to do, or weren't paying attention to what was going on around them. God forbid we actually ever get in a position where we could get killed- I don't know right now if we'd be able to survive a real conflict, such as a missile or torpedo attack.

Even without the looming harbinger of going to war, there have been too many near- misses to even start counting, beginning from the time we left for our first sea trials in San Diego this past November. It's only a matter of time before something happens and more people get seriously hurt or killed, and I don't want to be one of them when it does happen. This ship ain't worth it any more.

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Tiger In A Cage

May 2017

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